My Dad's So-Called Life
by Carrie2sky
Summary: Set in the Lega Ninjago Movie universe. Lloyd is in elementary school and has to do an assignment for school on what his dad does for living-but he has no idea what he really does. Father/son bonding and humor.


**My Dad's So Called Life**

 **Author's Note: This is an AU one shot based primarily in the Lego Movie Ninjago universe. There doesn't seem to be a category for this on FFN, so I had to put it here. It's not meant to be totally accurate to the movie, but I did try to make a lot of parallels to the movie. Don't like, don't read. Flames will be ignored. I don't own Ninjago! Now enjoy and review!**

Lloyd Garmadon was seven years old and was in second grade. School had been in session for about a month, when the teacher gave the class a special assignment.

"Class, since we have been talking about jobs, I would like you to do a report on what your father does for a living. Then you will present it to the class as a show in tell," Miss Ferdinand announced. Then the bell rang, signaling the end of day.

Lloyd sighed. He didn't know much about his father, since his dad didn't live with them, and had no idea what he did. Everyone else seemed super excited about it. As they all filed out of school, Lloyd over heard kids talking.

"I'm going to have the best report," a boy named Chen bragged. He was a snobby, mean boy at school. He thought he was better than everyone, especially Lloyd. "My dad has the best job."

"No way, my dad's is way better!" a girl named Tanya argued.

Lloyd ignored them and made his way to his mom's waiting car, he wondered how she would take the news. She didn't talk much about his dad, nor did she seem to want to.

"Hi honey, how was school?" Koko asked her son as he got into the car.

"Fine, but I have to do an assignment on what my dad does for a living," Lloyd replied. "What does dad do, Mom?"

 _Oh boy,_ Koko thought. _I wondered when this would come up. How can I tell my son that his father is evil, conquering warlord?_ _Yet, I don't want him to think the worst of his father._

"Well, honey, I guess the best the way to find out is to ask your father." _It couldn't hurt for him to see his father just for one assignment. Right?_

"Really?" Lloyd asked, looking hopeful. He had never seen his father, and often wondered why he left his mom.

"Yes, I'll let you talk to him when we get home," Koko said.

* * *

When they got home, Koko dialed Garmadon's number and waited for him to answer.

"What do you want?" a gruff voice answered on the other end.

"Hi, Garm, it's Koko," she said.

"Kokes?" Garmadon answered softer with a hint of surprise.

"Lloyd had a project at school that he needs to talk to you about," Koko explained. "I'll have him tell you." She handed the phone to her son, who was standing nearby. She wanted to keep the conversation short.

Lloyd took the phone. "Um, hi dad."

"Hi, Luh-loyd." Garmadon said.

"Uh, Dad, it's Lloyd," Lloyd told him.

"No," Garmadon corrected him. "It's L- _L_ -O-Y-D. I named you."

"Um, okay, well…I have an assignment at school that I have to report on what my dad does for living," Lloyd explained, "and I don't know what you do."

Garmadon wondered how he was going to explain what he did without scaring the heck of his son. "Well, if it's all right with your mother, you can come visit me at my place and I show you what I do," he suggested.

"Okay, let me ask mom," Lloyd said. He turned to Koko. "Mom, Dad wants me to come visit him and he'll show me around, is that okay?" he asked.

Koko didn't relish the idea of her son being in her ex-husband's volcanic lair of dangerous things, but she did know that Garmadon cared about his son, and wouldn't let him get hurt. Besides, it would just be a couple of hours.

"Okay, sure, honey. Tell your dad to come pick you up," she told him. _I'll make I tell him to keep it safe,_ she thought.

Lloyd nodded and spoke into the phone again. "Mom said okay, but you need to pick me up."

"Can do!" He paused and added, "How do I get there?"

"Um, I'll get mom to tell you," Lloyd said, and handed the phone to his mother. "Can you tell dad how to get here?"

Koko reluctantly took the phone back.

"Uh, hi again. Can you tell me where you live?" Garmadon asked sheepishly.

* * *

Garmadon knocked on the door of his former wife's apartment. They lived in a nice complex. He made a mental note to commit it to memory for the future.

"That would be your father, Lloyd," Koko answered. "You can answer the door."

Lloyd ran over to the door, and opened it. He had no idea what his father looked liked, so seeing his dad for the first time was strange. He was all black with red eyes and four arms. Lloyd had no idea why. His mom had told him that his dad had changed, but he had no idea what she meant until now.

"Hey there, Luh-loyd," Garmadon greeted, ruffling his son's hair, still getting his name wrong. "Last time I saw you, you were bald and had no teeth," he said bluntly.

Lloyd wasn't sure what to make of that statement.

"So how old are you? You're five, right? You're five?" Garmadon continued.

"I'm seven dad," Lloyd answered, not bothering to correct his name. It seemed his dad was determined to continue to pronounce his name wrong. "I gotta get my backpack."

Koko walked over. Garmadon said hi to her. She nodded at him. It was too strange seeing her former husband again.

"Take good care of him, Garm. And make sure you don't tell him anything about what you actually do," she said in a low voice so Lloyd wouldn't hear. Bring him back by 6:30."

"I will," Garmadon promised. It was hard to see Koko too, after all these years. It brought back feelings for her. He shook his head and turned his attention to his son. "Are you ready to go?"

Lloyd nodded and followed his father, after bidding his mother good-bye, and Koko closed the door after them. "I hope I'm not making a mistake."

* * *

When the pair got downstairs, and out of the door of the apartment complex, Lloyd looked around for his dad's car, recognizing all of the usual ones, but not seeing one that would fitting someone that had four arms. The car would have to be pretty special, right?

"Um, Dad, where's your car?" he asked.

Garmadon chuckled. "Are you kidding me? I don't use something as _ordinary_ as a car. Besides, we need something special where we're going."

As Lloyd wondered what his father meant by that, the warlord led his son around the corner and showed him his shark mech. "Feast your eyes on this, Luh-loyd!"

"Wow! That's awesome!" Lloyd gushed. Garmadon smirked and helped him get in and off they went.

* * *

On the way over, Garmadon wracked his brain on what to say to his son. He was in school, right, so that seemed like a good subject.

"So, uh, how do you like school, Luh-loyd?" he asked.

"It's fine, I guess," Lloyd answered. "But there's a boy at school that's really annoying. He said his dad has the coolest job."

Garmadon snorted. "Hmph, I doubt it. Wait until you see what I do. That kid's dad will pale in comparison."

Lloyd was now really curious about what his dad did. They made their way through the city, and ending up on the beach. Lloyd really wondered where they going.

"Um, dad, are we going into the ocean?" Lloyd asked.

"Yep! Watch this and be amazed, Luh-loyd," Garmadon beamed and steered the mech into the water and it went completely under.

"Wow!" Lloyd exclaimed. As they went through the ocean, which was really neat how the mech managed in the water, Lloyd noticed rocky outcroppings, and on them there were outposts. As they got continued along, a large volcano came into view. The volcano itself looked like normal enough; it even had lava coming out of it and billowing smoke, but it was completely surrounded by water. All kinds of ships and mechs were going in and out-fish themed ones-Lloyd noted-of the large entrance that looked like a mouth with teeth. Was that were they were going?

"Welcome to my VOLCANIC LAIR!" Garmadon announced proudly as they got off the mech. Some people came up right away to take care of the mech.

The warlord's first order of business was to introduce his son to his generals. Garmadon made it very clear that he was in charge of them all. If the generals thought it was strange that the warlord had a son, they didn't dare comment on it.

Lloyd wrote in his notebook that his dad was in charge of a lot of people. Maybe his dad was a manager?

"Wow!" he exclaimed, amazed, trying to take it all in. "Is it safe to be in a volcano?"

"Of course, if you know the secrets," the warlord winked at his son. "Don't worry, my scientists engineered an artificial, controlled eruption, so it won't erupt for real and kill us all. We also have safety measures like crazy in place."

"So, is this volcano made of earth or metal?" Lloyd asked.

"It's a combination of both," Garmadon answered as Lloyd jotted all this down for his report. He didn't really understand all of what his dad was saying and had to ask how to spell some things. Garmadon was very patient and helped Lloyd write it all down. He was impressed that his dad seemed to know a lot.

"Now, let me show off my mech hangar." He led his son to open cavern filled with giant machines.

Lloyd noticed that they were all ocean themed. There were jellyfish shaped mechs, rays, crabs, and octopi. He guessed it made sense since his dad lived on water.

"Check it out, Luh-loyd. I bet no one has anything like this!" Garmadon boasted.

"Wow!" Lloyd stared around in wonder. He was particularly drawn to a silver manta ray looking one.

Garmadon noticed this. "You like this one?" he asked. "It's currently one of the fastest, and it can fly."

"Yeah, it's really neat. What do you do with all of these?" his son asked.

"Well, you know, we test them out for different situations to, uh, gather information," Garmadon answered evasively. It was partially true after all.

"So are you a master builder?" Lloyd asked, writing down some more notes.

"Sure am, but I also have a team of engineers who designs some things for me," Garmadon explained. After spending a good amount of time in the mech room with Garmadon practically bragging to Lloyd all their features, they moved on.

"Okay, son, next I'm going to show you something quite unique," the warlord told his son. He took him into a room that had a large tank that pretty much filled the room, and in the tank where lots of very large sharks.

"Why do you have sharks, dad?" Lloyd asked, watching the sharks with both awe and intimidation.

"Well, they are pretty fun to watch and you never know when they could come in handy. Would you like to feed them?" Garmadon asked.

"Uh, sure, I guess," Lloyd answered. "It is safe?"

"Of course it is. Let me show you." Garmadon had one of his generals bring him a bucket of fish. Then they climbed a ladder on one side of the tank. His father then opened a small hatch at the top.

"Just drop them in, like this," the warlord instructed Lloyd, "but don't get your hands too close."

After watching his dad drop one in, Lloyd dropped in some fish and the sharks went crazy, eating up the fish, and stirring up tons of bubbles.

"That's called a feeding frenzy. Cool, huh?" Garmadon said, excitedly.

"Yeah!" Lloyd answered, watching the sharks gobble up the fish. Maybe his dad was a shark keeper.

After climbing down the ladder first, Lloyd noticed a room that had a cracked door, and was curious about it. He started making his way there when he felt four arms on his shoulders.

"Hold on there, son. There's nothing of interest in there," Garmadon said, leading Lloyd away, using two arms to keep him in place. "I want to show you my fireplace room. It will knock your socks off!"

The pair made their way to the giant fireplace room. Below the see through grid-like floor was hot lava, with some kind of small platform in the center of the room. Lloyd wondered what that was for. In the front of the room was a desk and a creepy looking statue, with lava blazing behind it, giving it the appearance that it could spew fire.

"What do you do in here, dad?" Lloyd asked.

"This is a part of the volcano that helps keep it safe by venting lava," Garmadon told him. "Do you want to see something really extraordinary?" he asked Lloyd.

"Sure," Lloyd answered, wondering what could be so fascinating in this room.

"Okay, watch this," the warlord said. He put an old piece of junk on the platform. Then he walked over to the desk, and pushed a red button with an x on it. It went shooting out of the volcano at top speed.

"It's a trash ejector. How cool is that?" Garmadon asked his son.

"It's great, as long as that's all you fire out it," Lloyd said.

Garmadon laughed manically. "Of course," he said. But he made a mental note that he could use that as idea to fire people who displeased him. Maybe turn the room in a staff room.

The pair started to make their back they way the came. Lloyd spotted the door from before. Just then, a general stopped to ask Garmadon something. Lloyd was really curious about the room. He checked to make sure his dad was distracted and then he carefully sneaked away into the room.

It looked fairly ordinary. There was a desk, with some strange dark, glowing, purple stuff in a bowl. In a far corner, there was a bed with a nightstand and a volcano shaped clock on the wall. Must be his dad's room.

As Lloyd walked over towards the bed, he noticed a picture frame on the nightstand. He picked it up. It was a photograph of his mom, dad and him as a baby. They looked so happy; it made him wonder what happened.

"Luh-loyd?" Garmadon finally found his son. "Here you are." He had gotten concerned when he didn't see Lloyd after he got done talking. His place wasn't exactly child friendly, and he didn't want his son wandering around by himself and stumbling on to things he shouldn't see, like his weapons room. He was frantically searching when he noticed his door was open and he then caught sight of his son.

Lloyd looked up as his father came into the room. "Sorry dad, I just really wanted to see what was in here, and I found this picture."

Garmadon looked at the photo that his son held in his hand.

"Dad, what happened between you and mom?" Lloyd asked quietly.

The warlord sighed. "It's a long and complicated story, son. I'll tell you when you're older."

Lloyd put the picture back. He went up to the desk where the glowing stuff sat. "What's this?"

"Luh-loyd! Don't touch that!" Garmadon rushed over to his son. When Lloyd gave him a questioning look, he continued, "It's a special kind of mineral, and has to be handled _very_ carefully." _Whew, narrowly avoided that one_ , Garmadon thought. _That dark matter could have been the end of Lloyd. His mother would kill me!_

 _So does my dad does collect minerals_? Lloyd thought.

Garmadon looked at the time and saw it was getting close to 6:30pm. He led Lloyd out of his room and they walked passed another room with a sign that read GIT, Garmadon Information Technology, authorized access only.

"What's in there, dad?" Lloyd asked.

"It's my highly specialized tech area, but it's off limits, Luh-loyd. I have all the latest tech, of course," Garmadon answered pridefully, while steering his son away with two of his arms. "Anyway, it's time I took you back home."

"Oh, okay, dad," Lloyd answered, feeling a little disappointed.

"Did you get all the information you needed for your report?" Garmadon asked, as they walked towards his mech hanger.

"Well, I guess, but I still don't really know what you do," Lloyd answered. "So far I have manager, master builder, shark keeper, mineral collector and a tech."

Garmadon swelled with pride that his son had come up with all these ideas of what he did for a living. He just couldn't tell him about his real plans and what he actually is; a conquering warlord. He couldn't dash his son's image of him… not yet anyway.

"Well, I actually do all those things, Luh-loyd. You could say I'm a man of many talents," Garmadon laughed as he led Lloyd up and into his mech. He told him he could ride shotgun, which seemed to make Lloyd very happy.

* * *

As they rode back across the vast ocean, Lloyd watched in awe as they passed all of Garmadon lookout posts again. Lloyd wondered what his dad needed all those for, but decided not to ask.

Garmadon himself was reflecting on his time with his son. It had been a nice, showing Lloyd around his volcanic lair. It was nice to have his son to show all his stuff off to. It stirred something in him that he hadn't felt since Lloyd was a baby and he had plans to build his son's future on the ashes of Ninjago. He shook head as they approached the apartment complex.

The pair made their way upstairs in silence. Before he knocked at the door, Garmadon turned to his son. "Well, it was nice spending time with you, Luh-loyd," he said awkwardly.

"Yeah, I had a fun time, dad." Lloyd felt a little awkward too, but added, "thanks."

"You're welcome," the warlord said. He knocked on the door, and waited for Koko to answer.

"Hi mom," Lloyd greeted his mother. He turned back to his father, "bye, dad." Then he did something that Garmadon did not expect; Lloyd gave his father a hug. The warlord slowly wrapped his four arms around him in return.

Koko told Lloyd to go wash up for dinner. She then turned to her ex-husband.

"How did it go?" she asked.

"I showed him what I did, and I kept it safe," Garmadon answered. She didn't need to know that he showed him a few dangerous things, right? Lloyd didn't get hurt, which is all that mattered. He hesitated and then started to ask, "Koko, can't we…"

Koko cut him off. "No, Garm. You made your choice." She made sure Lloyd wasn't in earshot. "You still want to conquer Ninjago, don't you?"

Garmadon couldn't look her in the eyes. "I…do."

"Well, I know there will be someone out there to stop you," she said. "Goodbye, Garm." She shut the door.

Garmadon walked away, feeling a little heavy hearted, but the evil ran strong through his veins and he couldn't help himself. He was determined that one day he would conquer Ninjago.

As Lloyd was washing up for dinner, he idly wondered when he would see his father again.

* * *

 _Nine years later…_

Lloyd was sleeping when he was awakened by his Ninjago ring tone. He groaned and slowly reached for the phone. It was an unknown number, but it said volcano on it. When he answered, he was confused as he heard a loud crunching sound, and then saw a bowl of what looked like cereal. Then slowly a face came into view.

It was Garmadon.

 **The End!**

 **Note: Hope you enjoyed! Again it's not meant to be a perfect match up to the movie. And there were one or two elements I used from the TV show also. But this was just a fun one shot that was in my head. Review please!**


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